2013 begins. A brand new year, a brand new me, a brand new us. We are not like how we are 6 years ago. All those who knows me well will know what I'm facing through. 6 years ago, I found you and you pampered me with all your love to make me feel like a princess. For this, I thank you my dear. Counting down to be nearly 7 years, here I'm..23 years old, gonna start my last semester of studies and ending my 4 years of study life in june. A whole new world awaits out there..the vast opportunities..at least for now, I have a clear mind of something I wish to go for after studies, to work in NEA :)
7 years down the road, you have gradually started your dream as well since the mid of last year. A dream full of responsibilities as well, being the only son. Your future is bright dear, I can feel it. And whenever you tell me I'm part of it, and that you are working for the future for 'us' and not only yourself, I know you are the guy I will want to settle down with. Sadly the simple love life I wish for, will never happen on my end. Came with the guy I love comes great responsibilities that I have to share with, a lifestyle and social culture that's not my league as of now...All these months, you have pushed me,strive me to make me a better person, to be readily accepted by your family.
I never once forget your words, be it of encouragement, love or reverse pyschology, its all these that kept me going to try on changing for a better self for a better me. But looks like all these months I have changed with a wrong mindset, and this has set me in hell and put you on tremendous stress in this rs. Sorry I pushed you too hard.
'Settling down, having our own home, have our rings...' everything will be thrown off my mind from now on..I have think too much for this love that I'm suffocating it. Things will get better, and I will start to change..for a better me. Priorities will be reset, studies and family will come first from now. Only by adjusting your position in my life can I then learn to be more independant, less childish and be more mature.
Thanks for telling me I'm a gem in your life and always has been despite what I have brought upon you. You are a gem in my life too, my one and only superman. I love you always and this will never change. No matter how I'm gonna start adjusting my life..how hard it will all be to attain the true happiness I seek at the end of the day, I will strive on. Thank you too for watching my back always and be there if I were to fall.
I have to learn how my feelings should be expressed, how and whom I can trust to express to. Never wanted to depend on bf too much as much as I could, I'm glad for these girls in my life. My intimates and my bff. Thank you girls for always being there, not forgetting others who have encouraged me through all the way.
True words hurt and it's only through the voices of those who loved you, can these truth be unveiled before you. I should stop being so naggy and whinny. Learning to have faith, courage, intelligence, mature and slowly developing myself from a girl to a woman is what I need to do now.
Throwing back my old self, a brand new me awaits and tomorrow is the day where I truly start a whole new year, a whole new chapter..with new found friends and my love of the life, my superman. Thank you for always letting me know u guys have my back no matter what happens.
Ending off with an impromptu trip to Bintan on Saturday with Boyf :) His holidays has ended and he's bound for flying coming thursday to continue fighting his dream soon, presumably only able to see him when I fly over during CNY! Really love him for everything :)
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| And we are ready to set for Bintan Island! Whee! |
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| A view of Nirwana Resort Hotel! Amazing view! |
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| Mushroom Soup that's a little too foamy imo! |
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| Lamb Shank Beryani, a first for me! |
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| Our suite room :) |
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| I love that painting! |
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| Love nest for the night! |
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| Love the exquisite wood carvings of local tradition! |
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| Always love the perks of a Bathtub!=D |
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| The calming beach and lovely sky! |
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| Hello its me in LB bikini =) |
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| Spot my man and his love for the beach! |
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| Seafood feast at night at the famous Kelong Restaurant. Food is of average taste. |
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| Leaving my last footprints on the sea sand next morning=) |
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| Last meal here in Bintan! |
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| Ending off with a paranomic view of what our weekend is surrounded by :) |
I just wish to end this post saying how much I'm grateful for the life I have now, for the people whom I have met, for the wonderful meals blessed upon me and for the man I ever love. I would not sacrifice anything of these in exchange for anything else in the world. Cause you all are precious to me and always will.
I love you, Boyf.
